My heart pounds and worry surges through me: What if the person is interrupted by my call? What if they don’t want to speak to me? That’s one of the difficult things about desiring safety and seclusion from others; I get stuck with my own thoughts and doubts! But the problem with keeping to myself is that I lack self-confidence that anyone would want to accept me. 

I often think, 

“Why would God want anything to do with me?” I wasn’t anyone special for Him to care about. Couldn’t I just hide away and try make it on my own? For example, on sunny afternoons I used to go read my Bible on the back lawn and I found out that I wasn’t anyone who God should care about; 

I was disobedient and deserved to be separated from Him and His goodness. But instead he kept me close.